God know's what He's doing....did you know?

The missions team from Chile went home tonight. Well...they left for home tonight, anyway. They've got to go for about an eighteen-hour bus ride, and then they have to get on a plane after that. So that's a bust. I am sad to see them go. Even in just a week, we became good friends, and the house will be pretty quiet without them. But it was a really amazing week, and I praise God for all the things that He accomplished and began through us working together. We did a lot of really awesome things; lots of presentations in plazas, where a ton of people were able to hear the message of Christ. We did Bible studies and youth meetings and prayer meetings. We met lots of new people just walking around the city, passing out flyers to the university and professional training school students, inviting them to come over to the house for a youth Bible study. And we had a pretty great time together on our day of "rest"; horseback riding, exploring the Incan ruins of Saqsaywaman and the Temple of the Moon. All of these memories, I will cherish, but the thing that stands out the most in my mind, out of all these wonderful things is the day we went to pick Daniel up from the hospital (he's feeling much, much better, by the way. Thank you for your prayers).

Sometimes things turn out way differently than we expect or plan. But God is faithful to us, and He will use the unexpected, even discouraging, moments to do his will. Our plans definitely did not include taking a sick team-member to the hospital for a three-day stay, and we were discouraged and worried and even a bit frustrated. But it turns out, that unfortunate thing turned into something more beautiful than we could have hoped for. God is so good.

Unfortunately for Daniel, he is the one who had to "take one for the team." We visited him every day that he was in the hospital, and it was a hard, scary time for him, I'm sure. But in going to the Hospital (which we wouldn't have done if one of our own team wasn't admitted) we saw how much need there was there; and how little hope. On the day we went to pick up Daniel, four of us went to the children's ward and began talking to the kids that were sick or recovering from surgery or illness. We laughed with them, got to know them a little bit and their parents (the ones whose parents were able to be there, anyway), and we made balloon animals for them.

I have to say, I have a huge dread of hospitals. It takes a lot for me to work up the courage, get rid of my selfishness, and go visit someone. Even when close friends or family are in the hospital, it is still a difficult thing for me to do; to go visit. I just have a hard time in hospitals, and that's an understatement. But I know that we were meant to be in that hospital that day. I've never felt quite so much confidence in the midst of so much fear before. The confidence didn't come from anything inside me, I'm certain of that. I know that God used us to show His love and shine His light on the lives of those children and their parents, because that was His purpose for us. And now, the door has been opened for us to continue going to the hospital and visiting the children there.

Antuanet is one of the children we visited that day. She has cancer, and the doctors say that she's only got 45 days left to live. I don't have the words sufficient enough to express what kind of emotions I have felt over the last few days since meeting Antuanet and her mother, Juana. All kinds of things have surged through me; rage, frustration, compassion, pain, hope, peace, dissatisfaction...

It truly broke my heart. I cried a lot that day. I still hurt over it. I can handle pain in my own life, but to experience someone else's pain so personally is something else. While we were with Juana and Antuanet, Juana saw that I had a camera and she asked me if I could take a picture of Antuanet and give it to her so that she would be able to remember her daughter after she was gone. How would you feel if someone said that to you?

I have to remember that our God is bigger than this world. Like Jesus said, there is a thief. And the thief does steal and kill and destroy. If we can't see that, we are blind. But more importantly, Jesus does give life; full life. Life that has hope and joy in it, despite pain and death. Pablo and I prayed with Juana for a while. And I can't even imagine what she must be going through right now; she has no husband, and no other family around but her three children, one of whom is dying right before her eyes. I have no idea what she feels or thinks; if she has any hope. But what I do know is that she will probably remember forever the way she was loved by God during such a difficult time. And that is the kind of hope that God gives to us; where even in the midst of horrible things, we can feel comfort and love. We were able to print out the pictures and take them to her today. I hope to be able to continue visiting them and praying with them; loving them, being God's hands and arms and feet.

This world is full of things that hurt. But our God is bigger than that. He is victorious over pain, over death, over our worst enemy, even over ourselves and our own plans. I praise Him for that.

Please keep praying for Juana and for Antuanet and her other two children.