Sunday, October 30, 2005

The book is "Streams of Living Water" by Richard "Doober" Foster

I couldn't sleep the other night. I was lying in bed, unable to sleep because my mind was racing with thoughts of all the studying I need to do for two huge tests I have this week. I kept thinking that I would never have the time to read all the chapters I need to catch up on and the stress of all those racing thoughts (i guess just the one thought, anyway) would not allow me to sleep. So, since I have been newly motivated to do better in school, rather than lie awake in bed and think about all the studying I wasn't going to have time for, I just got up and studied.

I am reminded again and again of the amazing timing of our God. I really think sometimes procrastination is one of the avenues God uses to teach us. I was up until morning reading one of the textbooks for my Christian heritage class. I read for such a long time because I am cramming. I should have been reading from the start of the class, back in August. But I haven't read anything (which explains the 32% I scored on the first test we took)...(yes, the shame of this is the aforementioned motivation). Anyway, the point is that I really enjoyed what I read. It's hard to explain what happened. I just opened the book, started reading, and couldn't stop (I guess it wasn't so hard to explain after all). I guess the neat part was that the book's not that incredible. It's not one of those books where each page leaves you thirsting for more. (You know, like most of the stuff Stephen King writes, or Stitches, or Dave Barry Slept Here: A Sort of History of the United States by Dave Barry). It's just not a page-turner. Still, I was captivated by the ideas I was reading. I couldn't put it down, even though I started to get really sleepy sometime between 4 and 5. It was like something in me clicked on when I read about the lives of Abba Antony and Frank C. Laubach, and the relationship of Jesus to John, "The disciple whom He loved". (was that period supposed to go before the quotation mark? or is it fine where it is?) Something about the lives, no not lives...souls, hearts, faiths, strengths, weaknesses, all of it...made me want to be a better person. I was so captivated, in fact, by these new revelations I was reading that I even busted out a highlighter so I can go back and re-read some of the ideas that stuck out in particular. And I don't highlight too often.

But here's where the God-timing thing comes in. I really think that had I read this stuff a month ago, it would have gone in one...uh...eye? and out the other? I would have read the words with a cloudy mind and not thought twice about them (more likely, not thought even once about them). I would have continued on, not having learned anything new. But I didn't read it a month ago. I put it off. I was lazy and selfish and boring, and didn't do anything except for sit on my butt all day and purposelessly read myspaces and xangas and livejournals. (i'm not sure if i made up the word purposelessly. but if i did, i don't care). but just in the last couple weeks, the Spirit has been stirring in me; waking me up from my sleep, in a sense. She has been bringing toward the surface all the passion and energy that my selfishness has been smothering. So I think that because I slacked off and read what I read now as opposed to a month ago when I should have read it, I actually learned some things, and what's more, I want to read more of it. That's how I was reminded this week that God is present, and His timing is perfect. Are you really still reading this? That's why we're friends. Thanks for caring. Or just being bored. Whatever.

Now listen, I'm not going to tell you what it was exactly that I read that sparked this joy in me. Partly because I am still at the point where I am just on the brink of really deeply understanding those ideas and how they apply to me, and I'd like to read it again and get a better grasp on it; let a few more things click, a few more light bulbs turn on...and partly because I'm going to watch Crossing Jordan now.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

doober doober

alright, well i have been doing a lot of thinking, and i have decided that it's time for me to get my priorities straight. if i am going to get serious about really living the full life that Christ came, died, and rose again to give me...i'm going to have to stop messing around. no more wasting time on the internet trying to keep up with twelve different blogs. sure, i'll still go visit the others on xanga and livejournal and myspace every once in a while. but if they are interested in knowing what i'm up to (which they're not), they'll know where to find me. i have decided that i need to channel all my blogging energy into one place, so that i will have more time to get out in the world, ride my bike, take a walk, enjoy the sunshine and semi-fresh air.........or, i will just spend triple the amount of time over here in the blogger world. whichever. in any case, this is where i will be. it's going to be a little bit rocky here at the beginning, while i figure this one out. but hang in there, my friends. it will only get better from here. or possibly, worse.

what do you think? was it blasphemy to bring Jesus' death and resurrection into this?

Monday, October 03, 2005


well...i am beginning to enjoy my student teaching a little bit more. (though, i still definitely do not want to be a teacher). i was asked again today to run the class during sixth period. i gave the lecture last week on wednesday, and it went well. (by "went well" what i mean is that none of the students mouthed off, made fun of me, threw things, died, etc. they did, however, just sit and stare. but what can you do? that's what happens during 6th period.) anyway, today, in about an hour, i will go divide them into groups of three, pass out scripts, and be there to answer any questions they might have while the substitute teacher (who is getting paid relatively large sum of money) will sit and do absolutely nothing productive. what a bust. wish me luck! palabra a la madre...paz fuera.

Sunday, October 02, 2005


I just sat here staring at the screen for three minutes because I can't think of anything to say. Haha.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

henceforth, every title shall be "doober"

well, this blogger doober is unfamiliar to me. that's why i don't post so much. i'll make more of an effort starting now. more of an effort to post more often, that is. NOT more of an effort to post something worth reading. so don't get your hopes up.